Firstly my school
My school is a very, VERY gay school (homosexuals, don't take offense) in the Paris 15 area. Its name is EABJM, "Ecole" school, "Active" duh, "bilingue" bilingual, "Jeanine Manuel" the name of the heartless ***** who created it. It is supposedly one of the best schools in Paris, but I have my doubts. Firstly, the school in extremely rich. It gets ALL the costs paid for by the state, and the thousands of francs we pupils pay go straight to Jeanine Manuel's pocket. For a...lets say, colorful, description of the school, check out Mr.. ali's site: here Secondly, there are quite a few teachers I hate:

The Last-Year French Teacher:
At the beginning of last year, we had this real smart, cool French teacher. Towards Easter, however, he started acting strange. The school denounced him as "mentally unstable" (bullshit) and fired him. In his place they hired a drugged man called M. Demais. He is, I think, addicted to both dope and heroin (a slower-downer, and a speeder-upper) This is because he is AT THE SAME TIME, both doped (speaking slowly, dumb face) and amazingly hyper (walking around the class creating sonic booms in his wake*). Also, I did not learn anything from THIS bastard.

The Year Before Last Years' Math Teacher
Now this is funny. Last year we had a math teacher called Mme. Desnos (I think that's how you spelt it) this year she's retired (THANK GOD!!!). She used to, instead of teaching us math, a) mostly not come to class. We'd think she was absent, then we'd find her in the Library courtyard smoking. and b) when she did come to class, she used to swear at us and (literally) tell us that we were useless. She did this especially to this guy in our class called Alexis de la Ferrier (if anyone knows this bastard's email tell me). She used to shout at him for entire classes: "T'es nul! Tu ne va rien etre quand tu sois grand! T'es bon pour rien!"--> You suck! You're gonna be nothing when you grow up! You're good for nothing! You're useless, etc. etc. She also got in a fight with this Russian girl in our class (the teacher backed off when she threatened to call the mafia) and she made this boy in our class cry.

The Administration
This is what pisses me off most about the school since all previous points are BECAUSE of the Administration. They are useless bumbling IDIOTS who can't get anything right. They are disorganized sons of *****es who can't be bothered to lift a finger for the hundreds of people they *steal* money from.

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Ok, now for my "friends". As you may have guessed, the last names are not real.

Vincent "John" Brown
Vincent here is Canadian, and like all Canadians, he's...well...off balance. He shouts out loud in the middle of the street, he lies down on the floor in the middle of the square (as in "Place"), and he speaks French. Draw your own conclusions....

Ian "Bob" Green
This guy is an American/British hybrid which has for some reason lived all his life in Paris. He is a little (a lot) hyper, but he's (a little) smart, he puts on too much gel, is a pacifist, is a democrat, and you can reach him at: onclebob@mangoosta.fr. Don't worry, he speaks English. He just ICQ'd me to add more mean things to his thingy. OK, he's a ****ing retard, and he annoys me everyday, because I'm cursed (for the third year in a row) to seeing his face in English class. Bugger. UPDATE: he now has his own site, go to the "favorites" page

Ali "Idiot" Slick
Ali is the most useless person in our class. He does nothing but make UN FUNNY jokes and make fun of teachers...wait...that's what I do too!! OK, change of plans. Ali is the greatest person in the class (besides me) and he does the VERY USEFUL task of making un-funny jokes, not studying, and making fun of teachers. UPDATE: Ali has his own site, which predates mine, too: again, go to the "favorites" link.

Marc "Bill" Blue
Marc is also Canadian. I could just end this now and say "'nuff said", but then he'd think I'd be making fun of Canadians (which I am, by the way). He is too tall for his own good. And he plays basketball better than me, something that is not smart.... UPDATE: Marc (Bill) has now gone back to Canada, poor guy. We will miss him, until someone offers us some money, or food. At which point we'll forget him completely and proceed to doing whatever we were doing. But no, seriously, "May the Great Donkey Be With You, Marc".

Beyong "Ben" White
I'm not exactly sure how to spell your name, Ben, so excuse me. As you may have guessed, Ben here is Korean. He is also tall and plays basketball pretty well. He knows nothing about Kung Fu, though... Actually, he shouldn't, 'cause Kung Fu is Chinese, but Ben doesn't know anything about Tae K Won Do either, so there.

Vincent "John" Cyan
Ah, it's the retard. Since he'll probably never read this page, I can be nasty as I want. Vincent is (I think) leaning *slightly away* from being straight, and well, there. He is also tall ('bout my height) and...get ready... HE'S FRENCH!!! ARRRRGHHHHH!

Michael "Useless Person" Maroon
This guy pretends to be AMERICAN (for some reason) but is really FRENCH. He speaks French way better than English (or rather, he speaks English way worse than French) and he looks French too. We sometimes call him Michelle, which is a girl's name, and he seems to like it.

Frederic "Short guy that wrongly thinks he's funny" Violet
Fredo is a short French person with more freckles than you and I have skin cells. He THINKS he's funny, but he's seriously NOT. He goes outside for lunch, brings back huge-ass pizzas, and eats them in front of the whole school, never offering a bite...boo-hoo.

Jeremy "Buckle it" Cream
Possibly the most annoying person this side of the Atlantic, Jeremy's *not so subtle* homosexuality fails to attract any boys in the school, homosexual or otherwise. Therefore, he turns his attention on trees.

Jean Paul "JP" Useless
Not really much I can say about him, save what's already been said (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) but JP is American/French and not so good company (he keeps telling me I need his permission to talk). Update: Jean Paul is in my class this year too. God damn it.

The following people (people, relatively speaking, of course) are from the year 2001/2002

Patrick "Man Dude" Neon
Patrick's another person who plays Basketball better than I do. He is American, and I call him "man-dude" because that's what he says a lot. Unfortunately, in response he calls me Iraqi, which is completely unfair

Brian "Preacher" Dirt-Color
I'm sure there is a color between brown and red, but I'm not sure so I just put dirt-color. Anyway, Brian's also American, and we call him Preacher because one day in Physics class he fell off his stool, and en route to a hard place shouted: "GOOD LORD! Now whad'I have ta go an' fall off that stool!" Yes, he's a Mississippi RED NECK! He seems to think that christianity is the best religion, but well, all I have to say is HOW CAN A PERSON BE THE SON OF GOD??????? peace out ma niggaz

David "Red Afro" Sky-Blue
David ALSO plays Basketball better than me (I think I should maybe make a list of people who don't play basketball better than me, it'd use up less typing energy, anyway. This dude's Irish, and is really good in math. Actually, now I should change his name, 'cause he cut his hair, and now he don't have an afro no more. Update: oh yea, now he do.

Jao "Portuguese Person" Jean-color
Hah, Portuguese people!  hehe. Anyway, Jao was here last year, but I was blessed with the blessing of not knowing him, but since I performed some ungodly acts, I was cursed with his presence. No, really Jao is a nice (compared to hyenas and your average Werewolf, that is) person, and he is good (again, compared to afore-mentioned, hungry animals) company. Hmm. His actual name is Joao though, wonder why everyone calls him Jao....(reflection: prolly the same reason they call me arom)

Kuan "Kung-Fu" The Color of My Mouse Pad
Which is kind of blue, but not quite. Anyway, Kuan is Chinese, (let's not, this time mention basketball; competition is so childish) and beats up Patrick everyday...pity it doesn't work 50% of the time, though... He is such a annoying person though sometimes (you know I'm joking kuan), he hits you, right, with like all the force he has, but then dare to hit him back, even really softly, and he screams out in pain, or just splays himself across the floor, or something. What I haven't figured out yet is whether he's actually faking it or whether he's just real sensitive.

Michael "Canadian Person" Kind of Somewhere Between Black and White
Another Canadian??!! What did I DO to deserve this! No, seriously, I'm joking. Michael is EXTREMELY RICH and owns Versace, or something. He also picks on everyone, dunno why, though. Like, he's talking to you, then he starts punching you and shit. And he thinks he's all that just coz he took some Tae Kwon Do classes. My Karate skills (not to mention Ninjitsu breathing techniques) will whoop his ass every time.

Michael "God not another one" Kind of Purpely Color
OK, THIS POST WAS NOT INSULTING, BUT MICHAEL ASKED ME REMOVE WHAT WAS WRITTEN, AND I DID. CHEERS.

Max "Oh, my head!" Can't think of any more, sorry
Just hurts my head thinking about him! (joke, see?) Besides, all my aspirin's finished because of the two Michaels...anyway, he's French (or so he says, strikes me as Martian, that one), but he's got a very deep English accent. Again, draw your own conclusions.

DragAn "AOD"
Yo, wassap Australia, actually Serbia. Yo here y'all see the king, (I'm the Emperor), the D, the dragan! Part of the ZSB (Zola Square Boyz), mr. D spends his useless time on sins such as drinking beer and hanging out with samir (sorry samir, ya know i luv ya both). d-dawg is unfairly judged upon by our not-so-wise faculty members, and so we have made a pact (together with Ali, see the world domination page) that when we conquer the world, we will pound the area of the school into a flat barren piece of land where nothing will grow ever again! MWAHAHAHA. Back to the present, though, dragan thinks he plays better basketball than me, but the fact is that I'm very low-key and although I am the best, I rarely show off my skills.

Robert "Mon Lapin" Blond
Hello Robs. I kinda forgot to put robby in here (same with Chris + Samir) cause I didn't really know them at the beginning of the year. Robs is a nice guy (hmm) and he calls everyone "mon lapin" which means "my bunny". Hmmm....Oh, and he's English...... Think what you will I think he's just one of those people....They called 'em Britons last time I checked

Samir "Vend moi tes chaussures" Color of Dirty White Speakers
Samir was the one who tol' me I forgot some peoples' profile thingies. Samir is a Finnish (sorry, Algerian) person (oh God, I know I shouldn't make fun of such an already-handicapped race ;), he keeps comin' up to me an' askin' me to sell him my shoes, which I won't. He's Arab and Muslim too so I won't make fun of him more. Except he always seems (or used to seem) like he was in a state of permanent high.

Chris "Can't be f***ed" Black-in-Arabic
Chris always says "can't be f***ed" when he means "I can't be bothered" [to do something]. He plays good basket, and is hated by the French teacher even more than me, ali OR robs, which means at least we have someone to laugh at. Sorry at the poor quality of jokes here, but it's 12 AM and I have to go to this shitty Forum de Métier thing tomorrow. GRRRR. Good Night.

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IF I FORGOT YOU, FIRST SEE BELOW. IF THAT DOES NOT EXPLAIN THE REASON YOU'VE BEEN LEFT OUT, TELL ME, SO THAT I CAN MAKE FUN OF YOU TOO. ME FORGETTING TO PUT YOU HERE DOES NOT MEAN YOU'RE USELESS AND DUMB (no, that we find out from other things), BUT ONLY THAT I JUST FORGOT. SOMETHING I DO OFTEN BECAUSE OF MY LARGE CRANIAL CAPACITY, OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

PLEASE NOTE 2 THINGS: THERE ARE LOTS OF OTHER PEOPLE I'D ENJOY MAKING FUN OF, LEAST OF ALL PEOPLE LIKE DANIEL, ALEXIS, AND NICOLAS. I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TIME, THOUGH. SECONDLY, NOTICE I DID NOT MAKE FUN OF ANY GIRLS-THIS IS BECAUSE I AM A GENTLEMAN (ahem). ANYWAY, IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT I'VE WRITTEN ABOUT YOU, YOU DESERVE IT, BECAUSE ONLY A USELESS PERSON WITH NO LIFE WOULD READ THIS. HAVE FUN!